It makes sense that I worry about my future - I am divorcing, moving (every three weeks), changing focus and approach in my work, trying to raise a family.
There's a lot of change. Many things in my life are unsure or new. It's natural for me to be aware of, and occasionally awed by my responsibilities, however I need to be careful that my natural concern doesn't grow into an anxiety attack.
When I catch myself heading down a thought path that is not useful, I remind myself about building a life I would love to look at. And I stop and ask myself, how do I want my life? How do I love to see myself? The answer's always the same - as a writer. I remind myself to go be a writer.
Because the answer to how do I get to be anything is to do it. Just do it. The details will take care of themselves.
~ ~ ~
I've learned to deal with the stuff of life - crazy stuff that happens and you just have to surrender and muddle through. Like divorce and the fire and min-reno, the bad townhouse and two-month gap between homes. It's all learning stuff and I'm glad I get to experience.
Boy I'll be glad when it's over.
